A Certain Albino and Idiot
by outerelf
Summary: The two lolis solemnly swore that they'd get the two together if it was the last thing they did.
1. Chapter 1

a/n: Normally I don't do authors notes before stories, but I guess I should warn the lot of you: **THIS STORY CONTAINS YAOI**. It is also slightly AU because it's a hodgepodge of characters from different novels. The basics of the plot came from a forum post by shmaster. That is all.

* * *

Last Order giggled as she tugged at Accelerators hand, despite the fact that he was limping on a cane. "I met him today Misaka Misaka says as she pulls at your hand, hoping that you're listening." She sang out, and Accelerator grunted as he ignored her giggling.

"Misaka met the first savior of the Misaka Network, Misaka Misaka proudly declares while watching eagerly for your reaction."

Accelerators reaction was to completely freeze up for a moment in the memory of that spiky-haired boy that had faced him twice to help him realize and recognize the path he was taking. "What? Where-"

"Misaka saw him today going to school, Misaka Misaka declares while keenly watching your reaction."

Accelerators teeth ground just thinking about the boy. That stupid idiot!"

"Why are your cheeks turning so red Misaka Misaka worriedly inquires, afraid that a fever may be coming on."

Accelerator barked out automatically, "I DON'T LIKE HIM!"

Dead silence fell and the albino realized he had just shouted this out in the middle of a crowded hallway. With a groan, he covered his face. Last Orders sparkling eyes told him everything he needed to know- he was doomed unless he found a way to distract her.

"Come on you stupid brat. We have to meet with Yomiwaka and see about what we're going to eat today- hopefully not something from rice cookers again." He was getting sick of rice cooker food…

Even if it had been the only thing that had kept him alive while he had been in GROUP. Not a single person could cook in that group, and he ended up using rice cookers to cook. Nobody had dared comment on it, but-

Last Order smirked as she began to secretly plot. It would be a work of a master to get these two together, and she was going to show that she was a master. "Hu, hu, hu," She laughed to herself, as she began to send out messages to the members of the Misaka Network still left in the city.

* * *

It had not been a good day for Touma. Running to the grocery store, waiting in line for two hours, getting the special cheap eggs and flour- only to have the eggs break and the flour bag develop a hole, which leaked half of the flour before he noticed.

But even plugging the hole didn't matter in the end, because he ran into BiriBiri.

And the second the crazy female had seen him, she had let off an electrical spark- and he had reacted automatically, bringing his right hand up to block- forgetting that there was a bag in the hand.

The flour had exploded from the electricity (how, Touma had no idea, but knowing his luck… the laws of reality probably bent themselves just to give him more misfortune) and the resulting boom left his hand scorched, and BiriBiri dazed.

He had literally had to run for his life, before Judgment and Anti-skill arrived. All they would find would be a bag of exploded flour and a dazed BiriBiri. And she could take care of herself. He on the other hand had to get back to Index and feed her before she went insane.

He sighed as he opened the door.

Index was sitting in front of the television, like usual, as she absently petted Sphinx. "Touma! I'm hungry!"

"Ya, ya, I hear ya." He blew on his palm, half-heartedly hoping to blow some of the pain away. With a sigh he stepped into the kitchen, and turned on the sink water on cold, allowing the cold water to flow onto his hand, soothing the burn. "Tonight it's going to be something simple."

"What? No way Touma! You promised me that you'd get pork tonight."

Geh! He had, hadn't he? "S-Sorry Index, but a certain BiriBiri middle schooler fried all our flour and completely wasted a weeks worth of allowance. I'm going have to ask dad for more."

Touma looked rather depressed at that thought. He hated asking for money from his parents whom he didn't remember anymore. "To~u~ma."

The fact that Index was breaking his name into syllables suggested to him that he was going have to be careful against being bitten. "You promised me pork."

"B-But Index, we haven't got any money left- ARGHHHHHHHHH!" The cry spiraled up into the air, as the sound of biting echoed loudly.

Touma flailed miserably against Index's chomping, as Sphinx hissed at the two, back arching and tail puffing out. Thus it was neither of the two heard a soft knock at the door.

Outside, Misaka 4242 waited patiently for the spiky-haired youth to answer the door, nervously fidgeting all the while.

Last Order had sent out the command to bring Touma, as soon as possible, to the park where they had first seen the boy. She was here to carry out that order, slightly puzzled, but obedient to the Network Administrators will.

And she further wondered why this had to be done with utmost secrecy.

The door slowly opened to reveal the savior, rubbing at a few bite marks. " Ah! Misaka-san!" A breeze blew by conveniently, showing off polka-dot panties. "Oh, Misaka's Sister! Why are you here?"

"Misaka received an urgent request for you to come to come to the park where you first met one of the Sisters, Misaka relays the information."

"Eeeh? Is something wrong going on?" Even as Touma spoke, he was already groping around for his shoes.

Index sighed as she spotted the clone standing in the doorway and Touma looking for his shoes- it looked like she was going to go hungry for a little while longer. But- Touma wouldn't be Touma if he didn't leap to someone's rescue. She sighed as he left the building without a backwards look. Maybe she'd raid his 'secret' stash of money and go try to buy dinner somewhere.

As the door closed behind the boy, she dived for the hiding place- just mere moments before remembering that she had already raided the stash, and there was no more money.

Touma glanced back at the shop, as he thought he heard a piercing shriek of Index, before the Sister tapped him on the shoulder. "Is something bothering you Misaka inquires worriedly."

"Hmm, no, it's nothing. I just thought I heard something. Guess it was nothing."

Misaka smirked to herself as she let down the electro-barrier that had interfered with sound waves- the watching three Sisters that had helped her out nodded at her thanks, and went to clear the way.

They needed to stop the red-haired man from getting close, as well as a few of the oddly dressed women. Misaka Mikoto, despite being the original, was definitely not allowed to cross paths, and Kuroko was perfect for that. In all, the path to the park was the most danger free that Touma had ever experienced.

The two walked silently and quietly to the park, Touma expecting any minute to be beset by misfortune. After all, with the way the day was going…

Misaka 4242 contemplated life's meaning, before completely and utterly discarding it to send a message to Last Order.

Last Order, from where she was at, grinned, and turned to Accelerator, sitting on a bench and staring up at the sky. "Misaka Misaka just wants you to admit you like Kamijou Touma."

"No." The answer was far too fast to be truth, and a vein was beginning to throb on Accelerators forehead. For three hours he had to put up with Last Orders teasing- and apparently Yomowika knew Kamijou Touma as well.

Touma was well known by Judgment and Anti-Skill for managing to rescue the people before them, and then leaving behind dozens of giggling, in–love girls.

The 'in-love girls' part solidly convinced Accelerator that for him to 'get' the Hero would be absolutely impossible. The chance that the hero would actually even think about an albino as a love interest was completely idiotic anyways…

"But you do! You like him! Admit it!"

Accelerator shot to his feet, back to the entrance as Touma rounded a corner. "FINE! I ADMIT I LIKE KAMIJOU TOUMA! WILL YOU LEAVE ALONE NOW?"

He didn't notice a certain spiky-haired boy stop dead, nor did he know that said boy was rapidly backing up, and he definitely didn't notice the boy running away from said park-

He did notice Last Order's sly grin. "Whatever your planning you'd better forget about it completely. It's not like that Hero would return my feelings anyways- he's surrounded by girls, and one of them is bound to catch his attention."

"Then why hasn't he started dating yet, Misaka Misaka sneakily inquires as she glances in the direction of the park front."

"…You did something, didn't you." It wasn't a question. It was a statement.

Last Order pouted cutely. "Misaka would never do such a thing Misaka Misaka protests her innocence as she hopes her frowning face will derail you from your current thought."

Accelerator took a deep breath, and let it out slowly- and swore loudly. Last Order frowned as he started limping for the dormitories. If Last Order was grinning like that, then **he** wanted to be out of here- especially if Last Order called for her network to fetch Touma.

* * *

Index blinked as Touma came tearing into the room, panting and wheezing. Quickly he shut the door, locked it, and collapsed in front of it, head hanging. "Touma? What happened? A magician attack?"

Touma, wheezing for breath, and brain not quite there, blurted, "I overheard Accelerator say that he liked me."

Index's breath stopped, as her head jerked automatically downwards, bangs hiding her eyes. Touma took a second to go over what he just said- and panicked.

What was Index going to think- what were all of the magicians going to think? Was he going to be fried by Biribiri for consorting with her greatest enemy- was Accelerator even the same person he once was? Touma knew practically nothing about Accelerator, so could he honestly reply to the others feelings?

If it were a manga panel, then Touma had no doubt that steam would be rising from his head. But he didn't live in any such thing, and thereby, as it was, he just had a really bad headache. "I-Index?"

The girl twitched slightly, bangs still hiding her face. He took a deep breath, "What… What do you want to eat? I feel ready to fix anything right now."

The small mouth puckered into a frown, and he flinched backwards.

Silence hung for just a few moments more, before Index looked up with a dazzling smile. "I'm going out."

"Huh?"

Index ran out of the building, not looking back for a moment, as Touma stood behind awkwardly, wondering what on earth the nun was doing.

_Stupid Touma. I should've known that he didn't like girls…_ Plip. _I suppose I should go see who this 'Accelerator' person is and see if they're good enough for Touma. Stupid, stupid Touma…_ Plip, plop.

Index scrubbed at her cheeks and took a deep breath. First things first- she'd visit each and every one of the parks to see if she could spot this Accelerator- whatever he looked like…

She glanced around, and spotted a familiar looking white-haired man that had once upon a time, given her a pack of tissues. Grinning, she ran up to him. "Ah- you're the nice person who gave me the pack of tissues. I don't believe I got your name!"

A tiny girl peeked out from behind him, and his eyebrows rose. "Weren't you the Nun looking for someone named Touma?" He asked callously, not really caring- until he remembered. Touma. Touma Kamijou? No- No way…

Last Order snatched the nun by the hand as she started running in an opposite direction, and Accelerator swore inwardly as he felt the Misaka network draining away from him- the little brat had guessed the same thing as him, and was going to confirm it! If so- if so _zalfjdlas_

Any comprehensible thought trailed off into gibberish, leaving behind a frustrated level five esper.

Index looked at the small girl pulling her along quickly in curiosity. The small girl stopped in front of a shopping district, before looking up with bright, shining eyes. "Do you know a Touma Kamijou Misaka Misaka inquires hopefully while eagerly awaiting your answer."

"Yes, Touma is the one taking care of me currently- do you know an Accelerator?"

"Yes Misaka Misaka chirrups, punching the air triumphantly! Acclerator is the one taking care of me, Misaka Misaka explains proudly, wanting it to be clear. Although Accelerator may seem rough, he truly is a nice person-"

"Ummm, Touma came home today saying something about Accelerator."

Last Order stared up at the nun with sparkling eyes, urging her to go on. "Misaka Misaka urgently inquires if the savior was disgusted by the idea, not wanting to reveal her plans until told the reaction."

Index shook her head, a sad smile gracing her lips as she said, "Touma didn't reject it out of hand- rather he seems to be trying how best to reply to such a thing."

Last Order punched the air in triumph, laughing. "Are you willing to help the two become a perfect couple? Misaka Misaka inquires hopefully."

Index stared up at the sky, remembering Touma's smile and words- and the words of the Albino that had fed her and given her a pack of tissues to use. Then, she came to her decision.

With a sly grin of her own, the two loli's stared at each other in perfect agreement. "We'll get those two together if it's the last thing we do!"

Elsewhere, a certain albino, and spiky-haired idiot felt a chill go down their spine.


	2. Chapter 2

Touma grumbled as he slipped into his shoes- Index hadn't come back yet, despite it being really close to dinner time. An Index who wasn't hungry, was an Index that was probably an impostor- or it was one of his few good fortunes that seemed to use up all of his fortune for a year, and bad fortune would quickly strike.

He slipped out the door, leaving just in time to miss the panting, wheezing, ready to kill, red-haired magician as he finally managed to shake off a little teacher loli. The magician took a deep breath as he knocked at the door- and only got silence instead.

Touma didn't even bother to look back at the shout of rage- it sounded like Stiyl, and the last thing he needed was an angry magician after his rear for not knowing where Index was.

Silently he took out his mobile phone, and pressed the buttons for Index's phone.

"This number is currently not available-"

"ARGH! SUCH MISFORTUNE!"

The cry hung in the air, as Touma considered pulling his hair out. His head hung, and with a sigh, he resigned himself to walking around the city until he found the nun, or she called him back. Really- why couldn't she remember how to properly use a phone? She had all of those grimgores, so why?

With a low growl, he stormed off towards the park. Really, he was just going to start where he knew Index had visited once before, and work his way out from there. She wouldn't have gone to his school seeming how nobody would be there at this point in time.

Frowning, he touched his cellphone again within his pocket. Would Index call him? He sighed, rubbing the back of his head.

Well, no sense in worrying about it for now. Index had to be around here, and at least if he was out and about, looking for Index he was unlikely to run into Accelerator.

No sooner had that thought been processed, then bad luck decided that it was to show herself.

He ran into a certain short haired, biribiri middle school student, shaking in anger. "_you_."

"Yo! Biribiri!"

"HOW DARE YOU JUST RUN OFF AND LEAVE ME!" A high-charged voltage jumped from the middle of her forehead, heading directly for him. His hand jerked up automatically.

Piang!

The lightening vanished as she trembled in fury. "You- Do you have any idea of how much trouble I got into? It was lucky that Kuroko was nearby because she teleported me out before Anti-skill could start arriving! Don't you know-"

Touma growled back in response, pointing a finger at her. "It was your own fault! You were the one that exploded the four! See! Look! My hand is still burnt!"

Touma waved the hand at her face, and she went bright red, stuttering, "W-W-Well, it's your own fault anyways! If you would stop skipping out on our fights-"

"I don't have time for this! A certain silver-haired nun is currently lost in Academy city and I have to be the one who goes looking for her! Argh, darn it all! I don't have time for this!"

The teen began to walk past the girl, heading deeper into the city, when Mikoto raised her hand, a ball of lightning forming within it. "I SAID FIGHT ME!"

Touma took off running, dodging electric attacks.

_Such misfortune!_

_

* * *

_Index contemplatively stared at the burger in front of her. Last Order had called on one of the Sisters to provide some money for them to go eat at a restaurant, as well as keep an eye on Accelerator as she at last gave him back his thoughts.

Said Albino was of course storming around the city, looking for her. Last Order cheerily sipped at her drink, as she finished laying out the plan. Index nodded as she took a bite of her twenty-second hamburger.

The Sister accompanying them looked slightly panicked as she stared at her wallet. It was rapidly growing thin, and soon she would need to either limit the nun's eating, or she would have to call upon others from the network.

… Limiting the nun sounded good. "There is little money left, so food funds may be limited, Misaka points out while hoping you would accept the excuse."

"Wha-? No fair! Nergh, and I'm not full yet."

Misaka's head tilted away as she said, "Feeding said subject completely full would be impossible."

"Huh?"

"Nothing Misaka reassures lightly, while smiling through gritted teeth."

The two women sneered at each other. Many of the Network were absolutely heartbroken that Kamijou Touma might just be gay- and horrified at the thought that Accelerator of all people was being considered a likely candidate.

But if this was for the good of the savior…

Index bit into her hamburger, while complaining, "Touma being Touma will probably ignore all hints or misinterpret them as something else. Even knowing that Accelerator likes him won't do anything- he'll just ignore it."

"Hmm, that is a problem, Misaka Misaka says while contemplating the problem. But according to dating advice from books that the Misaka Network has picked up, the basis to all relationships is spending time together!"

Last Order and Index glanced at each other, and looked out the window, to where no doubt Touma and Accelerator were looking for them. "So…" Index began, before grinning. "Do you want to stay over at Touma's place for the night?"

Last Order nodded eagerly in response, a hand shooting up in the air. "Perfect idea! While we wait there for darkness to fall, we can plan everything out! Misaka cheers eager to share her ideas."

* * *

Touma wheezed for breath as he leaned against the rough brick walls. He had finally managed to loose Misaka Mikoto, but only after running through a series of back alleyways that would probably confuse even Index.

So for now, he had absolutely no idea where he was. Still wheezing for breath, he exited the alleyway, and onto a main street. Curious, he glanced around, trying to find some sort of landmark, or something he could recognize. Well, over there he could spot the building where he met that bow magician and where Index had been kidnapped once more.

Okay, now he recognized where he was. Touma straightened all the way with one deep breath. Now all he had to do was start visiting each and every restaurant and ask for a silver-haired nun.

"Gahh, it's going to be a pain in the rear to visit each and every restaurant…" Touma mumbled aloud, a depressed aura falling onto him for a few seconds, before his hand clenched and he looked up with set forward eyes.

He took one decisive step forward onto the street, forgetting to look before exiting out of the alleyway.

To both his surprise, and the surprise of another, he walked straight into another person, and sent the both of them head-over-heels. "Ow-ow-ow- what just happened?"

Touma awkwardly stirred from where he had landed on top of the other, hand slowly coming to his head as he looked down.

And completely panicked.

"A-Accelerator?"

The albino groaned as his eyes shot open, and wide, startled blue eyes stared into snarling red eyes. "W-What do you think you're doing!"

Accelerator instinctively snapped on his choker, and gestured. A blast of wind knocked the other back, and Touma brought his hand down sharply. Piang!

The wind stopped, and Touma dropped to the ground, three feet away. Accelerator bounced to his feet easily, as Touma brought his right hand up ready to block any attack.

All thoughts of him being the one Accelerator had meant when he said he had liked someone were wiped from his head- it was obvious that Accelerator didn't like him, and in fact hated him. Touma blinked as Accelerators hand rose, waiting for the attack.

To his surprise then, Accelerator clicked the choker off, and grabbed his cane from the ground. "So, it's you."

"Yo! Accelerator! I guess this means we're not going to fight?"

Accelerator smirked, hand stealing to his choker, and Touma backed up, babbling apologies profusely.

Accelerators eyebrow rose… this was the hero? While he knew that teen didn't go around knocking everyone out, or anything, it didn't seem to be in his nature either to so easily give in. Or apologizing. "So, this is how you really are?"

"Eh, huh?" The head cocked at him quizzically, and Accelerator could feel anger building up- just how dense was this person?

"Erm…" Touma straightened up from his fighting crouch. "Actually- I'm looking for a silver-haired nun. You wouldn't of happened to of seen her, would you?"

Grack! Accelerator twitched slightly. So the nun he had fed earlier was the one related to this hero! What was he supposed to do now?

"Last Order grabbed her by the hand and took off running."

"… Last Order? Ah, that tiny girl that looks like Misaka Mikoto? I remember her!" Touma blinked, looking at Accelerator curiously. "Are you the one taking care of her?"

The albino wondered how the other teen would react if he said yes- not believe him, refuse to accept it and beat him up? Either way… Red eyes met blue ones squarely as Accelerator said a simple word. "Yes."

Touma stare back into his eyes for a few moments, before grinning. "Good."

There was no condemnation encompassed in that single word, and Accelerator felt an weight lifting, as Touma looked up at the sky, and unexpectedly brought a loosely clenched fist on top of a flat palm. "That's right! I remember- the second time we fought… the girl you were protecting was that Last Order, right?"

Accelerator nodded before tsking. "That brat ran off."

"Yeah- but if she ran off with Index, then they couldn't of gotten far- we should start looking for the nearest restaurants."

"Index? Is that the trouble-rising nun's name?"

"Oh, you met her? Ah! Were you the one who gave her that pack of tissues the first day I met Last Order?"

"…Yes."

The two stared at each other, wondering how exactly they had managed to miss each other in the shopping center, before Touma sighed. It wasn't that hard to believe after all. Accelerator began storming towards the nearest restaurant. "Come on, let's get this over with."

The two wandered down the streets, looking into each restaurant.

Along the way, Accelerator learned something very important about Touma; the teen was the type of person who'd rather run away when it came to confrontation unless he could help it- also, he was the person haunted by bad luck.

Accelerator had lost count of the times Touma managed to get hit, thwacked, or otherwise hurt in space of two hours. Really- who the heck had flowerpots on their windowsill anymore? And who actually carried long planks of wood down a empty street and manage to hit the single person going down the same street? And why were there convenient puddles of water for cars to speed through and splash onto a person walking near the street?

Even as Accelerator watched, Touma easily stepped over a ball, and continued walking on- only to have a chance wind blow the ball right back underneath his feet. "How on earth does this guy survive?"

There was no physical answer- but as Touma slowly picked himself off the ground, his phone began to ring.

"Huh? Hello?" Touma pressed the buttons to answer the phone, even as Accelerator drifted closer, wondering who would be calling at this time.

"I-INDEX? WHAT ARE YOU DOING BACK AT THE APARTMENT?"

Accelerators head jerked up, as his eyes narrowed at the spiky-haired boy beside him. "Wait, what? Last Order is with you? Oy- you two- OI! Why can I hear eating in the background? What do you mean your hungry? I've been out here searching for you for hours!"

The phone went dead, and Touma closed it angrily. "Last Order and Index are back at my apartment cleaning out the fridge."

All the anger in the other boy whooshed out in a large sigh, and he sighed, "Such misfortune," before turning and pointing. "My home is that way."

Accelerator simply nodded and trotted after him.

The walk there was surprisingly misfortune free. They didn't run into anything, and nothing ran into Touma. Somehow, Touma could feel that misfortune was just building up, waiting to strike at the worst possible moment.

The ten story apartment rose into view, and Touma stepped onto the lift, pressing the eight button.

Instead of sticking like it normally did- it worked.

A dark aura was beginning to gather around Touma, as he wondered just what was going on. What sort of misfortune was he going to face-

He opened his apartment door, mouth opening to automatically say, "I'm home!" when the scene registered itself.

The entire room was completely and totally trashed. Sheets had been pulled off the bed and rigged into a tent, the small table moved, the mattress dragged onto the ground in the sheet tent, cans lay littered around in various positions, the books were stacked semi-neatly in piles on the corners of the tent-

Two smiling faces poked out of the tent, smiling sweetly up at him. "Welcome home Touma!"

* * *

_a/n: Ah, behold, the second chapter. I hope you all enjoyed, and please don't forget to leave a review!_


	3. Chapter 3

Accelerator stared at the odd tent before him, wondering how on earth the two small girls had managed to do this much- surely they had to of had help…

"Touma, I'm hungry. Cook us dinner!"

"You- if you were hungry then you shouldn't of run off. I'm too tired to cook-" Touma broke off, cowering in fear as Index bared her teeth at him, growling like a little dog. "-Ahhh, at least return the bed back to normal."

"No. Last Order is staying here tonight."

Silence. Accelerator's hand was slowly tightening on his cane. It made sense that Last Order wanted to stay with the man that had rescued her and her Sisters, instead with the murder that had killed over ten-thousand of them.

He was about to turn away, and leave when Last Orders voice piped up. "Is Accelerator with you Misaka Misaka inquires hopefully, hoping he is."

Touma stepped aside to allow the small form to hurtle past him, grabbing onto legs instead. Last Order beamed up into Accelerators face as she sang out, "You are staying with me, aren't you? Misaka Misaka inquires as she reminds you of the promise you made."

Accelerator dragged up a sneer as he silently chopped her on the top of the head. "Of course you stupid brat. But-" Accelerator looked at the tiny room beyond, as he pointed out, "There's absolutely no room."

It was true- Last Order and Index took up the entire futon. The only area left would be either the bathroom or the kitchen- and Accelerator didn't want to sleep on cold hard tiles. "Besides, isn't it a school week?"

"Yes, it is-"

"TOUMA!" The shout from the nun caught all of their attention. "I have been very patient with you whenever you go to this school thing and don't play with me. I also don't complain when you don't feed me enough. Last Order and Accelerator are staying over."

Touma's head hung as he sighed. "Yes."

Accelerators eyebrow rose. "Don't I get a say in this? Look here you stupid brat, Yomikawa is waiting for us."

Last Order smiled simply as she said, "Yomikawa has already been informed that we will be staying here, Misaka Misaka informs helpfully while thanking the sister network! Ow! Why are you chopping silently and continuously, Misaka Misaka cries while shedding crocodile tears!"

Touma's eye twitched, and a cold wind blasted through the area. Last Order shivered, and Touma instantly nodded. "You guys can come on in while you sort this out." Touma offered as he pointed at the warm, inviting room, despite the mess. "I have to cook dinner anyways…"

Accelerator and Last Order looked at each other- and Accelerator silently stepped in. It was too tempting an offer to pass up, and he would leave the second he could convince the brat-

Last Order slammed the door shut, and Touma twitched as the sound of a lock clicked. Last Order grinned up at Accelerator as she chirruped, "All connection to the Misaka network is cut off except for the normal strength Misaka Misaka states proudly while hiding behind Index."

Accelerator attempted to charge after the little brat, before tripping over a pile of books and landing on the sheet tent.

The sheets collapsed on top of him, and Index frowned. "My tent!"

Touma ignored the loudness as he walked into the kitchen- Index wanted pork, and he didn't have much of it left…

His eyes brightened as he remembered Maika's talking about a Korean recepie earlier called 'Bulgogi'. Pork fried with veggies and rice- He opened the refrigerator, browsing through the various selections.

Quickly he began to sort out the different ingredients.

Accelerator was in the middle of taking Last Orders cheeks and pulling them out violently when the smell of something frying caught his nose. Last Orders eyes widened as she peeked over Accelerators shoulder. "A apron Misaka Misaka says in excitement, wishing to see Accelerator in something like it."

"You- what do you take me for?" Accelerator pulled at her cheeks, and the tiny girl sniffled loudly. Accelerator growled as he released her cheeks and turned to look at the cooking boy.

Last Order turned to look at the boy efficiently cooking enough food for ten, before offering her opinion. "He would make a very good girl, Misaka Misaka gives her solemn opinion."

Fwoosh!

Touma, catching the comment, nearly knocked the pan onto the ground, spilling all of the food.

Instead he barely managed to catch it in time, his bare hand slapping against the heated metal and sliding it back onto its burner. Then, with a cry of pain, he ran to the kitchen sink and turned on the water.

Cold water poured out thankfully, and Touma sighed in relief. Accelerator firmly squashed the impulse to ask where the burn ointment was. Touma pulled the hand from the sink, and blew on it a little. "Touma- you didn't drop any of my food, did you?"

There was worry under-laced in the words, and Touma shook his head as he waved the hand in the air. "Of course not. Who do you think I am?"

"Touma is a very unlucky boy. But you can cook and clean so you'd make a perfect housewife."

If the words were in a speech bubble like in a manga, then they would've speared right through his heart. Touma trembled as he cried. "H-Housewife? I'm a man, I know I am."

Accelerator grabbed Last Order by the hand. "We're leaving."

"No Misaka Misaka states firmly, wanting her two saviors to get along."

Touma's head rose at that statement, as Last Order looked directly at Accelerator.

The albino sighed, and gave up. Last Order wasn't moving, and the nun wasn't helping at all as she had helped to shield the smaller girl behind her. "It's decided then! Misaka Misaka cried in joy as she snuggles up to Accelerator."

The albino noticeably didn't say anything, only making a small, disapproving noise. Touma moved back to the cooking food.

A slightly uncomfortable silence fell, as the fighting and bickering at last came to a close, and Accelerator could feel his eyes beginning to droop. It had been a long day, and searching for Last Order had compounded the weariness. The small room was warm, and slightly cozy, as the soft smell of frying food permeated the air. Last Order and Index, both in a rare bout of silence, were watching Touma's cooking avidly and with sparkling eyes.

Touma, on his part, was busy trying to remember how it was supposed to be cooked. Although he might of cooked for quite a few years now, he couldn't remember those years. With his memory loss, he couldn't even remember what happened last year.

But- his body still remembered, and his body went through the motions easily.

Carefully putting the least amount of pressure on his burnt right hand, Touma carried the sizzling frying pan to the pushed in a corner table. Index was already at it, and Last Order tugged Accelerator next to it.

The rice cooker filled with nothing more then rice was placed next to the table, and Touma grinned as the two girls eagerly began piling their plates. He nudged Accelerator. "You have to move fast if you want to eat anything."

The two boys fought off their respective Loli's for a small portion of the food. Last Order and Index clapped their hands together, crying, "Thanks for the food!"

With those words, they dug in.

The food was simple, but surprisingly delicious- if this was the fare that Index generally ate, Accelerator could see why she had such a big appetite- just not why she wasn't fat yet.

As the food flowed, conversation did as well- Index started it with a simple question. "Touma- have you done your homework yet?"

"…" Touma looked at the stacks of books scattered around the room. Somewhere in that mess, there was homework. "I give up. I'll be scolded by Komoe-sensei. Besides, I'm a level zero anyways-"

"Impossible." Accelerator instantly snapped back. "A level zero? As if! You fought and beat me!"

"Yeah- well, about that- according to the system scans, I'm a level zero."

"They're wrong then. You're at least a level five."

Touma shook his head automatically. "No, no- it's just my right hand."

"THAT SORT OF THING DOESN'T MATTER!"

Accelerator had read a few reports about 'Kamijou Touma' ability- most of it was ambiguous, and watered down. Whoever had written about it had not wanted the information falling into the wrong hands. Or they hadn't known how to classify the power themselves.

But- from the reports he knew that it was only the right hand from the wrist up that had the power to [negate] all supernatural things. As for the rest- it would undoubtedly kill him.

Accelerator silently dug into his food. It helped that the moron had developed a type of 'precognition' to help in his battles- but it took timing and skill to use just ones right hand.

Last Order and Index felt the heavy mood, and moved instantly to relieve it. "Touma, where are you and Accelerator going to sleep tonight? There's only room for one person in the bathtub."

Accelerator snorted. Now there was one place he had never thought about sleeping. As if sensing Accelerators disdain, Touma turned baneful eyes on the powerful esper. "It's not funny."

"What are you talking about, it's the perfect place for someone like you to sleep."

The sharp retort held no mercy, and Touma's fist clenched. Automatically all the muscles in Accelerator tensed, and his hand pressed down against the table, prepared to strike back. Then, with a loud sigh, Touma flopped back. "I should look for my homework. Index, did you see it?"

Index looked behind her, before pointing. "There, there and there should be your homework."

Touma sluggishly got up, and started heading towards the pointed to piles.

* * *

Accelerator stirred sleepily, eyes sliding open to look around to see what was going on.

The place where Touma had been sleeping was empty. On the table were three perfectly wrapped dishes with little nametags about which belonged to whom. Touma was nowhere to be seen- he probably had already taken off for school, judging by the time.

Accelerator sat up slowly, before glancing at the small indent next to him where Touma had ended up sleeping… he wasn't certain whether or not to thank Last Order for this opportunity.

Even if last night he hadn't gotten that much sleep over the fact that he was _right there_, he had gotten some sleep- and it was time for him and Last Order to leave.

"Oy, you stupid brat, come on. It's time and past that we were gone."

Last Order rolled over and clung to the nun. Accelerator tugged at the little girl, and snarled, "Come on!"

Index smiled sleepily as she woke up, and said, "I'll accompany you!"

"No! Absolutely not!"

"I'm going." The nun declared instantly. The next part of the plan had to be set in motion before Touma got too comfortable around the esper.

Elsewhere, a certain idiot felt a chill go down his spine.

* * *

_A/n: Hello all, let's say I've been inspired lately ;) I hope you're all enjoying this story. Please don't forget to leave a review!_


	4. Chapter 4

Touma yawned sleepily as his head rested against the desk. He had left behind food for his unexpected guests (and no, he _so_ wasn't thinking about what it was like sleeping next to Accelerator) and what he hoped was enough food for Index.

He was slightly surprised that his morning had been as lucky as it had been so far. He would've personally thought that he wouldn't of been able to get up that morning in time to properly cook anything- instead he even had a bento. "Sock Unfolded Speed Drift will now take place in the hallways! Everyone ready?"

The answering roar shook the windows with its ferocity. Touma, curious, stood up to go walk outside when the door slammed open violently.

A frazzled looking Komoe-sensei stood in the doorway, carrying a stack of papers almost as big as she was. "Ah- Komoe-sensei- Hinegami! And… Yomikawa? It's not your turn to teach class so why are you-"

"Actually, I came here to drop off notes for the substitute teacher." The woman smirked as she hefted a large envelope, filled with papers. "I have Anti-skill work unfortunately."

As she waved the envelope, a picture fluttered out, landing face up on the floor. Touma bent down to scoop up the picture- it was the picture of a young girl, no more then twelve to fourteen hears old. She had wide blue eyes, and short blond hair. "Huh? Who's this?"

"Wannai Maaya." Yomikawa paused, before smirking, "You wouldn't happen to know her, would you?"

Maybe once upon a time he did, but he no longer did. He shook his head in response to her question as he handed the picture back. "Did she get into trouble?"

"Ha- it would be nice if that was true. She is suspected of being kidnapped and consorting with some darker elements of Academy City. Really…" Yomikawa was about to go on, when another roar from the hallway drowned out the words.

Instead of a roar of approval, this was a roar of fear. "It's the Principal! Run!" "Quickly, it's Fukiyose next to him!"

"EVERYONE RUN! IT'S FUKIYOSE FOREHEAD!"

At the dreadful proclamation of seeing the girls' forehead- only seen when she was serious- the door was opened, and students swarmed into the classroom, sweeping the teachers off their feet, and Touma found himself inexplicably crushed among the girls.

Out the door he could see more students running down the hallway in their socks, before using their socks like ice-skates to go fast.

One of the espers, probably a level two, gestured to the ground, and the people started going faster.

A cheer rose up from the escaping students- before they slammed into an wall, unable to turn fast enough. Fukiyose kept marching forward, principal right next to her, both about to bring down wrath upon the students heads. Komoe flailed among the packed students, and a few of the boys drooled as they said sweetly, "Komoe-sensei, are you alright?"

Touma groaned slightly, wondering if a certain somebody was having a much better day then him.

* * *

Accelerator didn't know how this happened. One moment he had been arguing with the nun about why she wasn't going with them, then next moment, he was out and walking along the street with the nun and Last order laughing and talking with each other.

The two girls practically ran circles around each other in their boundless energy, and the small cat perched on top of the nun's head meowed pitifully every now and then. Accelerator solemnly swore that no matter what, he was going to get the nun out as soon as possible-

It was very likely the other boy would go looking for the girl, and it wasn't like the nun had a cellphone-

The nun pulled out the cellphone from somewhere on her person, and began to exchange numbers with Last Orders own, glossy cellphone. The two girls grinned at each other, before turning to Accelerator with sparkling eyes.

Accelerator wondered if he was soon going to go broke.

"Ne~ Accelerator~" The nun sang out his name, as she and Last Order pointed to a vending machine. "Drink."

"No." Accelerator kept on walking, aiming to go right behind them. Maybe if he kept on walking they'd give up and let him sleep in peace on a couch back at the apartment.

Growl~

Accelerators heart nearly stopped beating when he heard the nuns stomach growl in hunger. Really? She had eaten just before they had left! "Grr- How on earth can you be hungry all of the time?"

Accelerator roared this at the girl, even as he tossed a note at them. Index caught it skillfully, before approaching the machine. Her mouth puckered into a frown, and she cautiously looked at the machine. "Buttons, buttons, buttons-"

Accelerator scoffed. "Haven't you ever used a vending machine before? How silly can you get?"

Index turned around, arms flailing, "I've only ever heard about them! I don't think I've ever actually used one except for once when I met Hyouka, but Hyouka told me the proper way to use them." Index paused, and turned back around.

"I may have used them before, but since I don't remember anything for a year ago, it doesn't matter."

"You don't remember anything?" Accelerator sounded slightly skeptical, and Index nodded seriously.

Her back was to him, but instead of her usual bouncy tone, instead she had a softer, much more solemn tone. "I met Touma for the first time when I was being chased and nearly killed. They were going after the 103000 grimgores I have. Touma stopped them from erasing my memory again."

So… this child had their memory continuously erased? It would make sense for the boy to act to save her- Last Order grabbed Index by the hem of one of her sleeves, tugging hard. "But you can remember everything now, right? Misaka Misaka states worriedly, hoping that no more memory loss will occur."

Index grinned as she finally fed the bill to the machine and pressed the button. "Of course not! Touma took care of it all."

And just like that, the hero took another step above where he could reach. Index pressed the button a second time. A third time. "IT'S NOT WORKING?"

"Really? Misaka Misaka inquires as she jumps up eagerly to press the button! Whoa! You're right! Misaka Misaka shouts as she presses the button multiple times. Perhaps if I shock it like onee-san does? Misaka Misaka inquires, while charging up the electrical energy-"

"Wait!" Accelerator began, before the electricity jumped into the machine.

The machine was ominously silent for a moment, before a shrill alarm began. Accelerators eye twitched, before he flicked on the choker, grabbed the two, and manipulated the vectors to send him shooting up into the air and away from the area.

No sooner had he done this, then a girl teleported into the area, flashing her green band for the world to see. "This is the Judgement-!"

She looked around as she spotted nobody. "What- did another teleporter do this?"

She walked up to the screaming machine, before shrugging. Now she could go off and enjoy Onee-sama's love. She turned away as the machine spat out a can, slamming directly into her head.

Slowly she turned around, as the machine shook, and spat out another can towards her head.

She instantly teleported to the side, as cans began to pour out, piling up.

The girl drooped, mouth gaping. As a member of Judgment… she would be expected to clean up all of this… "OH NO! ONEE-SAMA!"

Accelerator swore at the two in each arm as he landed slightly heavily. The Misaka network hadn't been able to completely handle the calculations as the battery spluttered softly and almost died.

He flicked off the choker quickly, and staggered, leaning heavily against the cane for support. Last Orders mouth puckered into a small frown, as Index looked to Last Order for what they should do. The battery dieing was an almost perfect way of setting up what they were going to set up…

"Are you alright? Misaka Misaka inquires worriedly, pulling at your shirt."

"I'm fine you stupid brat! Let's just get back to Yomikawa's place and let her feed the nun."

Accelerator stomped off towards the nearby building. He had no idea that Touma's place was so near where he was staying at…

The albino brutally shoved the idea aside as he focused on getting to the building ahead of him. The second he entered, he flopped down on the couch, and began to drift off to sleep, ignoring the two girls that piled in after him.

The nun would undoubtedly clean out the fridge, and then the two girls would end up either watching TV shows, or talking to each other- either way…

Accelerator quickly flipped on his choker and gestured to the door. The lock slid home behind the two girls, locking them in. It wasn't perhaps the best anti-escape idea, but it should be enough for him to be able to take a nap. He flopped backwards, and let his eyes close.

The two girls peeked out of the kitchen, waiting as Accelerator fell asleep. "Should we do it now? Misaka Misaka inquires evilly, chuckling to herself."

"No, not yet- we don't want him to suspect anything- we'll wait until its almost time for Touma to get out of school."

The two girls settled down to watch TV, Index keeping up a running commentary about the magic, where it was based from, comparing it to magic she herself knew- it was enough to make Last Orders head spin, and steam to rise from off of her.

Slowly time trickled by, the fridge quite quickly emptying of several weeks' worth of food as Accelerator slumbered on, his sleep relatively undisturbed as the two girls kept each other occupied. He had a random thought of how he could definitely live in this arrangement. Last Order was close, where he could keep an eye on her, and she had someone who kept her interested.

Of course, he didn't like the thought of being replaced but…

"It's two thirty-five. Touma should be getting out of school soon."

One of Accelerators eyes cracked open as he glanced at her. Index grinned slyly as both she and Last Order looked at each other. Accelerators eyes popped open, and he started to sit up, started to ask what was going on.

In a movement surprisingly fast for such a calm looking nun, Index leaned over, and switched off the choker around his neck. Accelerator flopped over, unable to move a single step. _Wait, what?_

"It's off. First we should put on the skirt, right?" Last Order shook her head.

"Of course not! Misaka Misaka declares proudly- We need to take him to the bedroom. Misaka Misaka declares, wanting to make certain the mode will be right."

Index nodded, looking around. Espers couldn't use magic, but- there were several other things that they could do to get him into the bedroom. He didn't look that heavy anyways.

* * *

Kamijou Touma knew he was an unlucky boy. That was why he had been having a near nervous breakdown all day as it turned out the homework he had forgotten about wasn't due until Monday, the Principal had decided that he wasn't one of those racing in the hallways, and the weekend was left open with absolutely no homework…

"Kami-yan, why so nervous?" Tsuchimido laughed as he watched his friend twitch.

Aogami Pierce tossed his head proudly, blue hair ruffling in the wind as he leaned conspiratorially close, "My, my, my Touma! Did you add another onto your harem? You have so many different types- I know, did you get a shotacon this time?"

"No. Absolutely not! Besides, this Kamijou Touma isn't that lucky with girls. It's simply I left behind Index with someone I barely know. I'm worried about how it will turn out-"

The cellphone stuck in his pocket began to ring, and Touma blinked as he pulled it out- it was from Index. "Hello?"

"Touma! I'm not at our house right now, I'm with Accelerator."

Geh. Crap!

Index began to rattle off directions to where she was, as Touma tried desperately to remember them. Turn right, right, left, right- "You better come quick Touma."

"Yes, yes." Touma sighed as he clicked off the cellphone, and after bidding goodbye to his two classmates, he left.

Tsuchimido and Aogami looked at each other, before Tsuchimido sang out, "I know a great shop~"

Touma on the other hand simply began the long trek to get the buildings Index had described. To his stunned surprise, despite the fact that the streets were busy, there was no one in need of help, nor was there any point where bad luck visited him.

Dread in his heart, he opened the door Index had described to him. "Touma?" Index's voice floated through the doorway, "Come over here, the second door to your right."

Confused and puzzled, Touma entered the room, and started walking towards the aforementioned door. He stepped into the room-

Only to have the door slam shut and lock on him. Startled, he turned, banging on the door. "Hey, wait a second! What's going on? Index?"

He turned around, eyes sweeping the room for something to use to break down the door, when his attention was caught on a huddled mass on the bed. Curious he approached it, and it slowly took the shape of a young girl curled up on the bed, wearing the school uniform of his school. Her short white hair spilled onto the sheets.

"Excuse me miss, do you know what's going on?" As Touma spoke, his hand reached out to brush along a black ring around the girls' neck.

There was an ominous click, and Touma felt all the bad luck that had been building up pour out at that moment as furious red eyes turned towards him, in a face that could belong to one person, and one person only.

"Accelerator." His mind stopped working, and he uttered the first words that rose to his mind. "You look pretty cute like this."

"I'll _kill_ you."

* * *

_a/n: Yay for traps! Thanks to all those that have reviewed and gotten me to this point. Special thanks goes to xYukii for giving me the idea of using Trap!Accelerator. If you read, don't forget to leave a review please!_


	5. Chapter 5

Black wings formed, framing the furiously shaking body, with a bright red face, like curtains. Touma began backing up towards the door, and pounded on it. Accelerator took a step towards him, the black wing sweeping out to try to cut off his head.

Instinctively Touma ducked, and the wings swept over his head, destroying the wall. Touma shivered in fear as he jumped over the destroyed portion of the wall, all the while shouting apologies. "I'm sorry I thought of you as cute! I'm sorry! I didn't mean to think of such things! This Kamijou Touma would just like to apologize-"

BOOM

The sound of a wall being destroyed hinted that he wasn't forgiven yet. Touma jumped over the couch, heading straight for the front door. If Index and Last Order were smart, they would hide until the whole thing blew over. If they weren't… well… he was a bit busy himself right here.

He burst out of the doorway, and went rolling, black wings slamming into the space where he was, just a hairsbreadth away. "Whoa, too close!"

He scrambled to his feet, and darted off to go further into the city. Accelerator's power source, how long would it last? Wait, why did he even have a power source? He shook his head, dismissing the thoughts- he could think about them later. As for now- he needed to concentrate on running!

Quickly he darted into the back alleys. Accelerator probably wouldn't kill unrelated people, but in the back alleyways he'd be able to circle around, grab Index, and then get out of there.

A pile of crates tripped him up, and he went rolling into a pile of trash. With a low growl of frustration, Touma erupted from the pile and looked up in time to see a limb of the black wings shoot overhead. Crawling, he started towards another alley mouth.

A tremendous booming sound could be heard from further behind him, as a voice raged, "Come out here you spineless coward! I'm going to slaughter you!"

"Who would come out after you said that?" Touma shouted back in an automatic response- before slapping a hand over his mouth.

Him and his big mouth. What was up with him lately? Was it because of the love thing he had overheard? P-Probably not… hopefully.

"_There_ you are."

Touma scrambled backwards as the albino, still in the girls uniform, landed right in front of him. He turned and escaped down an opposite alleyway, ducking low and right hand raised against any attacks.

He wasn't certain how long he ran, or even how far he ran. All he knew was that the attacks had stopped, finally, and he was in some sort of dingy back-alley. Not that there weren't any back alleys that weren't dingy…

Wheezing for breath, he bent over, hands against knees and head hanging. "Such misfortune."

He took a deep breath, and let it out slowly, his mind attempting to work. "Why did I call him cute? This Kamijou Touma's interest are in girls, and girls only! Boys aren't part of it- right? Ahah- I'M TOO CONFUSED RIGHT NOW! SOMETHING WONDERFUL- NO, DREADFUL JUST HAPPENED AND I-"

A piercing shriek rent the air, and Touma's head snapped up.

"Where-?"

The shriek pierced the air once more, and Touma moved instinctively towards the sound, faintly aware his right hand was twanging from the burns last night.

He ignored the twanging, heading straight for the shriek, not knowing that he had picked up a silent shadow. He ran through the back alleyways, before bursting out into a small intersection.

It was like the scene from a shojo-manga. Four or five guys were surrounding a single girl, backed up against a wall, eyes wide with terror. His eyes widened as he recognized her. "Wannai Maaya?" He called out, and the guys heads turned towards him.

A few of them looked at each other as they grinned, summoning balls of fire into their hands. Touma found himself in the odd position of wanting to half-sneer, half-laugh, and half-run away.

After facing a giant flaming sword more the 30 meters long, he wasn't terrified of the flames, but the flames brought back some bad memories. Well- that and Stiyl whom was probably getting ready to summon Innocentius on his rear. He twitched at that thought, a weak laugh almost forcing its way out of his mouth.

He felt more then heard something swinging towards his head, and he ducked, arm swinging back to elbow the person in the gut. The man doubled over in pain, and Touma pirouetted on one foot, right hand clenching to give him a vicious right hook.

The man went down and out for the count before Touma even really realized what he was doing.

He stopped dead, and this time a weak laugh really did come out of him as he realized that he was probably completely screwed. "Erm, please let my little sister go?" He asked in a weak attempt to diffuse the situation.

The answering sneers and calls of, "KILL HIM!" told him he had failed miserably. He took a step backwards, before spotting a man grabbing the girl by the arm.

Instantly he ducked several of the punches, blocked a fireball sent spiraling towards him, and rushed towards the girl. "Hey! Let go of her!"

A solid right fist, clenched as hard as it could, connected cleanly with a cheek, and the man released the girls arm, and stumbled backwards a few steps. "Run!" Touma yelled back over his shoulder, and the girl nodded, disappearing down one of the back alleyways.

A few of the delinquents charged after her, surprising the spiky-haired teen. Normally the delinquents would give up on the girl, and turn their anger on him. Instead they seemed pretty fixated on that one girl…

He stepped in the way, blocking the alleyway for a precious few moments in time for her to turn out of sight. The delinquents instantly began swearing at him, gathering in a semi-circle.

A tall man, taller then Stiyl, and weighing what looked at least about a hundred and eighty pounds emerged from the group of delinquents. Touma gaped up at him with sheer terror written on his face. The teen cracked his knuckles menacingly, smirking. "I see, so you're going to fight me- Well, I have to admit you're quite the brave one. Not many have fought me, especially since I've been known as the Blood Drinking Mongol-"

"Erm, Boss- he's gone."

Touma reflected it was perhaps the most hypocritical thing he had ever done to take off running before someone finished their monologue, but he wasn't concerned about such things. His life was far more important.

Besides, the rest of his class already judged him to be quite the lowlife judging by their comments. They didn't even say anything but 'It's Kamijous luck once more' when he had ended up carrying a mostly naked woman to the school infirmary. And not even he knew how exactly it had turned out that way.

A fireball blasted past him, impacting harmlessly on the ground. Touma began to zigzag, giving the delinquents a less presentable target-

Clang!

Touma felt the air whoosh out nearby him, and heard the air whistle as something heavy connected with his automatically risen right arm. He felt shocks of pain go down it, and grunted in response. The delinquent tutted as he pulled back and disappeared.

The teen instinctively turned, fist heading for where he could feel something forming.

Too slow. Even as Touma turned, another teleporter warped in right behind him, and took a swing at his head.

Bam!

Touma collapsed to his hands and knees, head bowed in pain. Something wet and sticky trickled down the back of his neck.

Bam!

A foot connected with his stomach, sending him rolling. He gasped in pain- they had stopped using their abilities. There was little chance of him winning unless they used their abilities-

The sound of a foot whistling through the air made his roll sideways, clutching weakly at his stomach. Slowly he staggered to his feet, left arm covering his stomach, gasping for air. His eyesight was hazy, and he couldn't exactly tell where everyone was-

KABOOM

The sounds of the delinquents screaming and running for their lives registered a few seconds late, and his head rose, and he blinked rapidly, attempting to clear up his eyesight.

Blackness stretched before him, framing a patch of white. He stumbled sideways, and hit the wall. With a low groan he slid down it, watching as the blackness took care of the delinquents. Slowly his eyes fluttered shut, and he allowed his body to slacken.

* * *

Accelerator had lost Touma somewhere. The white haired boy tched softly, the blush having faded, as he clicked off esp mode. There was only a little bit of the battery left, and he would need to replace it soon.

Darkness was beginning to fall and take a hold of the city. Accelerator limped forward, determined to find the boy before delivering at least one good blow.

Despite the solid decision, Accelerator was well aware that every time he thought about Touma stating that he looked 'cute' in this stupid dress made him go bright red. He really had too much of a weakness to those words, didn't he?

The sound of running feet brought his head up, and his hand stole to his choker. A girl came running out of the darkness, and her eyes lit up when she saw him. "Y-You there! Which way to the main street?"

"Tch, over there."

"Th-Thank you!" She stopped for a moment, panting, trying to catch her breath before she looked up with wide eyes. "You shouldn't go down that way- there are a bunch of men there trying to catch women."

Accelerator snarled. Out of all things to run into while here. However- for there to be kidnappings so close to where Last Order stayed was absolutely unacceptable. He'd wipe them all out. Then he turned to the woman. "How did you escape?"

A light blush dusted her cheeks as she said softly, "There was this spiky-haired youth that appeared and told me to run."

So, even while running for his life he had time to pick up girls? That guy was dead meat.

"Now I really am going to kill him after he mops up the floor with those guys." Accelerator muttered as he limped off in that direction, ignoring the woman's calls to come back.

The scene he had been expecting (Touma standing victorious over a pile of unconscious, hopefully dead, delinquents, smirking in triumph and laughing as the sun illuminated his back) was far different then the scene that did greet him.

Touma was punching empty space as another teleported behind him. Touma twisted in order to block, and a metal bat slammed into the back of his head.

Accelerator saw red. Literal red.

Touma collapsed, and Accelerator found himself rooted to that spot with the thought _This can't be happening. He's the hero. He isn't- he __**can't**__ be defeated like this-_

A foot connected with a stomach, sending that hero rolling. Accelerators hands began to tighten. A group of them. Touma was weak against physical attacks, and he had no doubt had to defend that woman before hand- and he needed to stop rationalizing.

Click

The soft sound didn't draw any attention.

The black wings that tore mercilessly into the skin and flesh of the teleporter that had brought the hero down did catch attention.

The teleporter dropped, screaming. The delinquents took one look and began running. Accelerators mouth twisted into an insane sneer. He wasn't about to let them get away-

The heavy sound of a body falling distracted him from painting the walls red. "Oh?"

He turned to find Touma leaning against the wall, head cradled in both hands. "Idiot- what are you doing now?"

"My head hurts." The words were strangely slurred, and Accelerator abandoned the men (he'd track them down later and bury them where no one would find them) to crouch down next to the other teen. Hazy eyes looked back at him, and Accelerators mouth thinned.

"Concussion. Stay still while I call that frog-faced doctor."

Touma nodded, the words slipping out automatically, "I still think you look nice in that dress."

A loud boom and a screech of sorry echoed loudly in the slowly growing darkness.

* * *

a/n: o/o _Yeah, erm... this chapter... I don't know what to say about it other then I have some of my favorite parts, and I hope you guys review and share with me your favorite parts._


	6. Chapter 6

"It sounds like a concussion. I'll send over an ambulance right away, but during this time I need you to keep him awake. Whatever else don't allow him to stop talking."

"Fine." Accelerator bit out, before flopping ungracefully next to the teen. He had to stay out here, looking like this, with a nearly dead battery- he was also probably going to end up being carted in by the ambulance workers.

"So-" He began, before stopping. What was he supposed to say? The two had never really had a chance to talk before. He barely knew anything about this person beside him, and yet had a crush on him.

It was rather silly actually, and not very well thought out.

"Accelerator?"

"Just- what type of girl would you like?"

Touma blinked, answer automatically slipping out. "Landlady Onee-san type."

_So… So precise. And why a landlady? Isn't an older sister type good enough?_

"But-" Touma sighed as he looked up at the sky- Accelerator instinctively took a step forward, hand reaching out to the growing wet stain trickling down the neck. "-I don't know if I can have a girlfriend anymore. People don't like playing second-fiddle. But I promised Index that I would protect her-"

An eyebrow rose on Accelerator as he settled down next to the boy, pressing a pale hand against the blood, not minding the flow. It'd be a pain to wash off, but it wouldn't be the first time he had to do so. "I don't see what the problem with that is. If it came down to a choice between the whole world and that little brat, I'd definitely choose that brat."

Touma grinned at those words, eyes fluttering shut. Accelerator snarled, "Don't go to sleep! You know, while in Russia, I learned what it means to fight to protect. Is that truly the reason why you fight?"

He wanted to make certain, to know- "Of course it is. Just by fighting to protect, you should know what the answer is, shouldn't you?"

"I've been fighting for Last Order before- but I hadn't been fighting to protect. Not- Not like I did in Russia."

"It's the same feeling the probably. That's the reason why I fight." Touma paused, struggling against sleepiness. "Fighting with your head held high, no matter what." Touma frowned, thoughts derailing and crashing spectacularly in his mind. Unable to tell what exactly he had been originally saying, Touma continued, "Why do you call me hero? I told you that day in Russia that I was no hero, but why did you call me one?"

Now that was an unexpected question. Moreover, wasn't Touma the one supposed to be talking, not him?

"You saved ten-thousand people by yourself. You faced me, a person that was spoken of with terror, and despite the fact that I nearly killed you so many times, you got back up. You made me realize that what I was doing was wrong. You made me realize that I'm still human."

"Huh? How can anyone not think of you as human?"

Accelerator was silent as he thought back to his childhood- the time when an entire tank division had been sent out to 'subdue' him because nothing else would work and people were panicking. The people that had fled in terror. Maybe perhaps this was the reason why he had gotten a crush on this man? Because he viewed him invariably as 'human' and not just 'monster'?

"That doesn't matter. That nun, she isn't your lover or anything?"

Touma shook his head automatically. "Absolutely not. It'd be a lost cause anyways. Nuns take a vow of chastity for life I believe. Anyways, she'd definitely little sister material." Touma laughed breathlessly, and Accelerator wondered how much blood the boy had in him. "Annoying little sister with a wicked bite."

"…She said that once she had memory loss, and that you managed to keep the memory loss from happening. How did that happen?"

"I… Don't know." Touma admitted. The headache was making it hard to think, and since Russia, Index knew about his memory loss. Neither had discussed it physically, face to face, both uneasily skirting around the fact, but she knew. "I lost all of my memories of that time."

So an amnesiac Touma was the one fighting him? How pitiful was he back then? "I do remember Index, Hinegami, Misaka Mikoto and her sisters, fighting you- I remember everything since September 30th."

That was a pitiful amount of time. Accelerators mouth opened to tell him, when the sound of tires told him the ambulance had arrived.

Silently he stood back as the trained doctors took over, quickly and efficiently transporting him to the ambulance. One of the doctors turned to him, asking politely, "Miss, have you seen a white-haired boy who was supposed to be around here? He was the one to give us the call, and we'd like to question him on what happened."

Then, and only then, Accelerator remembered he was currently in a skirt… oh he was so going to kill Last Order the second he could. "Don't know." He ground out through gritted teeth, turned, and stomped off towards Yomikawa's. He would take care of that nun for Touma until he could come back.

"Accelerator!"

"What _now_?" He turned as Touma called out his name, red eyes flashing.

"…Take care of Index please?"

"Ha, you don't have to ask twice. Besides, I told you right? Everyone comes second to that brat."

It was true enough- Last Order was family, an intangible concept he'd been wishing for all of his life. Kamijou Touma was simply a person out of his reach ( _not quite_ whispered some part of his mind, reminding him of his own bit of saving that he had just done) that he had a crush on.

Of course, Touma could also take care of himself, unlike that brat.

Darkness seemed to swallow him as he disappeared down the street, but the soft glow of streetlights briefly illuminated the form that didn't shrink from that light.

* * *

Last Order pouted as she poked at the crumbling wall. She was tempted to run away. Yomikawa would probably have a fit when she came home to such a mess, and Yomikawa angry was not an emotion Last Order wished to see

Index wrestled with the vacuum, as its chords caught and entangled her. "Grr-" Her eyes narrowed and she perked up as she heard a soft 'whir' sound. Cleaning robots made that sound. If she opened the door, they would come in, and clean everything up, right?

She threw open the door- neatly nailing Yomikawa in the head. The woman's head tilted back comically as she slapped a hand to her forehead. The cleaning robots following after her rushed in, sucking up bright clean swatches in the dust.

"Just what is going on here? Huh, you're- you're that nun that visits Komoe's class every now and then. What are you doing here- ARGH! MY WALLS!"

The teacher anti-skill stared in horror at the walls that were destroyed- including her bedroom wall. Well, that destroyed any chance of her bringing a guy over any time soon.

A white haired girl approached her slowly. She stopped, and cleared her throat. Yomikawa stared at the girl for a second before her jaw dropped. "Accelerator?"

"Last Order- prepare to be punished."

The trap swept down on the girl, bloodied hands rising, and Last Order grew very quiet at the blood. Accelerator frowned in confusion, his eyes following hers, before waving his hand carelessly. "This? Don't worry about it. That idiot got himself a concussion, so Yomikawa, that nun is going to stay here for the night, got it?"

It was the closest Accelerator would ever get to asking 'Please' but Yomikawa understood. "The nun can stay- if of course she helps clean up the mess."

Index, about to protest, closed her mouth at the scary glint to the smile. Besides, she had helped make the mess… and Touma wasn't here to clean up this time around.

A phone rang, and Accelerator picked it up. "Hello? Oh, frog-faced doctor- what do you mean he isn't at the hospital? The ambulance was a fake one? Do you have any idea- Got it. Give me ten minutes and I'll have that moron at your hospital."

He ended the call, and dialed another number. "Oi, Tsuchimikado. I need to know the hiding place of the DANCE illegal hospital faculties- ever heard of a person called Kamijou Touma? Yeah, he got kidnapped by one of them, he has a concussion- There? Good." The phone was turned off, and destroyed.

Accelerator stomped to where he had stashed his manufactured batteries for the Misaka Network, changed it out, and then changed out of the female school uniform. Then he was off like a shot.

Yomikawa scrambled to ask what was going on, but it was too late- the boy was gone.

She turned her evil eye on the two girls standing in the midst of the cleaning robots.

* * *

"This just in! It looks like multiple Anti-Skill attacks may be taking place here in Academy City. Several black-market hospitals have been attacked and completely destroyed. Oh- Wait- it says here that people are claiming a 'black-winged angel of death' came to destroy them. The real hospital has been filling with patients-"

The screen flashed to show a black-haired teen being carted in.

* * *

Lessar and Itsuwa huddled in a small corner, mumbling about how **scary** some people could be as they looked in awe at the burning buildings that Kamijou Touma had originally been in.

Somehow, both were suddenly wondering if perhaps trying to go after Kamijou Touma was a good idea judging by the newest guardian he had picked up.

* * *

Accelerator sighed low and weary as he mounted the steps to Yomikawa's place. Really, what kind of bad luck did that boy have to nearly get snapped up by a black market hospital?

"Excuse me, Misaka interrupts your line of thought politely while holding out an extremely old fashioned video tape. Please deliver this to the Network Administrator Misaka requests while waiting for you to take the video tape."

"What is this?" Accelerator questioned. He couldn't really believe it. A _video tape_? The thing you saw in museums nowadays?

"It's a video that may contain content on Kamijou Touma, Misaka clarifies as she begins to leave."

"Content on that guy?"

Accelerator frowned as he stared at it. It didn't seem possible... why would there be such content? Did the Misaka network get a command to stalk Touma's home or something?

Accelerator threw open the door to find Yomikawa, Last Order, and Index sprawled around the room, relaxing as the newly fixed walls and carpet practically sparkled with cleanliness. "Oh, I see that you repaired the walls."

"Yep! This magic thing that Index set up was a pretty cool thing. It completely remade the walls. What's that?"

"It's a videotape. Do you have a player?"

"For that old thing? No. You might be able to find it in an antique store however. Ah wait- I have a colleague that has a player. I can call them up to bring it over."

Last Order yawned. Accelerator instantly pointed off to the side, towards a bedroom. "Go to bed you brat."

"Not tired, Misaka Misaka claims petulantly while biting back a yawn."

"Now."

"Will you come with me? Misaka Misaka asks hopefully."

Accelerator held up the video. "First I'm going to see what's on this."

"Me too!" Index instantly said, while shooting to her feet. "Touma doesn't tell me anything."

"Go to bed with the brat." Accelerator spat out.

Index pouted, and Last Order grabbed her by the hand, whispering something softly in her ear. Index smiled and nodded, and the two girls happily trundled off in the direction of bed. Yomikawa, slightly suspiciously, and still wanting a proper explanation, followed.

None too soon, the Video cassette player arrived by a puzzled teacher. Accelerator snatched it, Yomikawa called out a absent-minded thanks, and the door was slammed shut.

It was the work of moments to hook it up, and with a furrowed brow, Accelerator popped in the video.

The picture of a TV station with a businessman sitting nearby appeared.

* * *

_a/n: I wanted to delve a little into Touma's past. Just a little. And this chapter somehow failed at being funny completely -_- Either way, please leave a review!_


	7. Chapter 7

"Hello folks, today we're here with a anonymous source. Now I'm certain that many of you have heard of this boy called Kamijou Touma." A picture of a young child, no more then four-years-old appeared on screen. His hair was flat instead of spiky, and he had a bandaid plastered to his cheek. "His most common nickname around this place is the 'Plague God of Misfortune' due to his ability to bring back luck to himself and those around him."

The second newscaster picked up smoothly, as clips began to play on screen. "Now, I'm certain that you may be wondering, 'How can a child be such bad luck?' Well, here's how. In this past year alone, Kamijou has been on the scene of an 'accident' for a grand total of one-hundred times- and that's just the documented cases! If you take a look at the pictures here- street sign falling and hitting several people causing several minor injuries the youth is standing in the background. A fire that broke out in a clothing store- he was there with his parents shopping. He got out with minor burns, but a few others weren't so lucky- there was one girl that was hospitalized for several months."

Accelerator's hands began to clench as he looked at these pictures flashing across the screen, a tiny little Kamijou Touma circled in each of the pictures.

"What- the heck is this?" Accelerator whispered to himself. "Bad luck and he's getting this sort of treatment-"

The newscaster spoke up again. "As you can clearly see he's been quite the hareld for bad events. In fact, we even interviewed his teacher, and here's what she had to say-"

The video cut to a mosaic image, as a young womans voice spoke. "Kamijou Touma? Yes, I have him in my class. Truthfully, there are some days when I'm fearful of going to school to teach him because he brings such bad luck… None of the other kids will go near him anymore, because if he gets too near you then his bad luck seems to rub off on you-"

Accelerator stood up from the couch to turn off the video, with the express intent of burning it. Pah, what were they? Children? As if someone could bring bad luck with them.

"Thank you Ma'm. Now then, we have here a businessman who claims that Kamijou Touma was the reason why his business failed."

Click.

The video was calmly shut off. Accelerator pulled out the tape, and hefted it in one hand, staring at it.

He had two choices- he could give it to Kamijou Touma, and let the youth clear up some of the mystery of his past life. Or, he could burn it because no one needed to know about this.

In a minute cleaning robots gathered around a shredded pile of filmstrip.

In three hours a news archive building was merrily burning.

In six hours, Accelerator was curled up on the couch, sleeping peacefully, smelling faintly of smoke.

* * *

Touma could not recall a time he had been seen naked. Touma was used to seeing girls naked. Although he'd certainly never admit it to the girls he did see, he generally liked said views he got.

But Touma could not recall a time when someone walked in on **him**.

One pair of surprised red eyes and one pair of surprised blue eyes stared at each other as the door was cracked open.

Index and Last Order panicked in the background, and Accelerator slammed the door shut. "You- JUST WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING SHOWING THAT TO LAST ORDER?"

"TO-U-MA! I'M GOING TO BITE YOU THE SECOND YOU'RE FINISHED CHANGING!"

"Ah! Misaka Misaka cries, while panicking over this love-comedy situation."

As the noise echoed down the hallways, a frog-faced doctor looked up from where he was filing paperwork, before shaking his head.

At last the door slid open to a completely dressed Kamijou Touma. "S-Sorry."

"Grr-" CHOMP

"SUCH MISFORTUNE!"

Accelerator smirked as the youth wailed in pain over the bite, and Last Order clung to his legs. The surrounding patrons were looking at them oddly, which Accelerator ignored in favor of watching the two people before him interact. He could really get used to this.

Screw the video that he had seen last night- Bad Luck? Even if the youth did have bad luck, it wasn't like Accelerator was that much different.

Slowly the place quieted down as Last Order and Index ran off to get food. Accelerator collapsed into the stiff metal chair, grimaced, and moved to sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Yo."

"So… do you remember last night?"

Touma shook his head slowly, brow furrowing in concentration. "No- I don't-"

Unnoticed by the two, the door slowly slid open, as Misaka Mikoto, Kanzaki Kaori and Hinegami Aisa peeked in. Touma brightened up. "Ah- I remember something- You made a very cute girl."

Silence. Accelerator trembled slightly, before clink!

Black wings sprouted and swirled as he roared, "WHY CAN YOU ONLY REMEMBER THAT ONE THING? HUH? WHY DO YOU HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT AND ONLY THAT?"

Kanzaki and Mikoto instantly reached for their respective weapons, when Touma threw up both hands. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Please be careful with this injured patient-"

"Accelerator! No use of ESP powers in the hospital. You're interfering with delicate instruments."

The wings disappeared, and Touma sighed with relief on the bed. Accelerator hissed, "Don't think for a second that I've forgiven you- I will get my revenge."

"Please no fighting. This Kamijou Touma is already injured."

"Your concussion was that serious?"

"Yes. Apparently it was compounded by some drug that managed to get into my systems from somewhere-" Touma groaned. "I don't understand what happened."

Accelerator snorted. "You were kidnapped by a black-market hospital and nearly taken apart for extra organs. I found you before it happened."

Mikotos' eye twitched. 'Found'? That implied one was looking-

"Really? Then do you want me to make you food in repayment?"

Two of the girls gaped, as Hinegami muttered, "I see, his flag has been raised. Someone is proceeding down the Kamijou path. But- not a girl."

She paused. "A boy love galgame?"

"He-He's…" Mikoto stuttered, and Kaori's head snapped up as Stiyl's roar could be heard bellowing down the hall.

"KAMIJOU TOUMA IS **WHAT**? I FORBID YOU FROM STAYING WITH HIM ANY LONGER! WHO KNOWS WHAT SORT OF NASTY THINGS YOU'LL SEE!"

"I refuse. Touma is Touma. Besides-" A slightly creepy tone crept into Index's voice, "I want to see where this will turn out."

Mikoto, still twitching, turned around and left the hospital. Kanzaki turned to see Stiyl attempting to convince Index that staying with Touma was probably a bad idea, which she ignored as if he were a humming cicada.

"Touma! Accelerator!"

The girl waved as she put on an extra burst of speed to catch up with them. Last Order scowled as she was being left behind, and put on her own extra burst of speed with, "Wait cries Misaka Misaka as she struggles to catch up."

Index didn't wait as she rushed into the room, jumping on top of Touma's bed. Accelerator scooted over to make room for her, and Last Order scrambled into his lap, pouting adorably.

For a single moment, Accelerator had an innocent smile on his face, something that completely took Touma's breath away. His heart skipped a beat, and his hand automatically reached out to cover one of Accelerators that kept him propped up on the bed.

The smile faded slightly, traces lingering as Accelerator turned a confused look at the teen. Touma grinned in response, as he said, "Thanks for keeping me awake in the alleyway and rescuing me from the hospital."

Accelerator turned away instantly, the faintest red on his cheeks. "I wasn't about to take care of that nun- that's your job."

"Give me a break here!" Touma cried, but both girls noticed with self-satisfaction that neither boy moved their hands.

Of course, there was still going to be a lot of work in the future. The love events would have to come fast and furious to prevent either of the two from slipping into 'just friends' territory, even if they had made a step in the right direction.

But- The two girls traded nods and looks. Even if they had been together for barely a day, it was hard to imagine life any different. And besides- this promised to yield lots of golden comedy.

* * *

**Omake**

_Ten Years Later_

Touma groaned as he heard giggling from outside of the bedroom. Beside him, a white haired man stirred as well, eyes slowly opening, asking, "What's going on?"

"The girls are outside. They're probably counting down the time until they can open Christmas presents." Touma said as he levered himself up onto one arm, and Accelerator grunted in response.

"We should get dressed," Accelerator sighed.

"It's nothing they haven't seen before." Touma carelessly tossed off.

Accelerator growled, "I can't believe you actually did that."

"What? Take you against the table? You weren't complaining then-"

"You didn't give me a chance to say anything!" Accelerator protested, and was broken off by a smothering kiss.

"Next time we'll make sure those two are out for the entire day before we do the table."

"You are incorrigible."

The door flew open as the two girls tumbled in, shouting, "It's six in the morning! Presents! Presents!"

"Out with you! We gotta get dressed. Hey, Accel, where's the video camera?"

"You left it on the table near the tree, remember? Sheesh, after nagging me for an hour straight-"

The two girls, already mostly out the door shouted, "Hurry up!"

The two looked at each other, before Accelerator shrugged and stood up. Touma followed suit, and both pulled on pajamas. Within seconds they were pulled into the warmly lit living room.

As they were being pulled, Touma casually leaned across the distance to plant a kiss on Accelerators cheek. "Merry Christmas love."

* * *

_a/n: THE END. I hope you all enjoyed, all of you who read. :D Please leave a review!_


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